Beauty Tips # 101

I am here to tell you that I am always looking for ways to enhance this old lady. Talking bout me of course. I am not talking face lift, liposuction(yet), or God forbid the right way, meaning eating healthy and exercise. I am talking those little teeny tiny tweaks that just polish your look. You know what I mean.
Okay here are examples. In the seventies , it was platform shoes....You have no idea what four inches does for a five foot nothing person. Alright I admit it, I am not five foot one and a fourth. I am five feet tall. In the seventies no one knew that. And all my jeans were longer, and I felt so tall. And it really made the me look slimmer. Forty inch bell bottoms also helped. Not the flared shit they sell now. Forty inches be-autch! Then the eighties. We had shoulder pads. I mean dynasty looking Chrystal Carrington shoulder pads. Just think what that did to the size of your hips and waist. Get the picture?
Okay so now in the 2000's it's this natural look. Think what that does for a fifty something kinda girl. It's killing me. So I have to depend on other ways to enhance the this old bod. High heels are back, but I fall a lot and I have one bunion and one good foot...I know it's the ugly truth.I don't have money for facials or pedicures. I have had one pedicure in my life and the Asian man who gave it to me commented on how tiny my toenails were. I was humiliated. How big are your freaking toenails bud?
I have no toenails, I have claws. Do you know how hard it is to wear open toed shoes when you have tiny little claws . How do you put nail polish on claws? It's like putting a dot on each toe.You know how people have their little cutey doggies toenails painted.? You get the picture. So ladies here is what I found. Fake toenails. You can get them in colors or french manicure. I kid you not. I have never had toenails in my life, and I feel beautious. It's the best thing since the forty inch bell bottoms of the seventies and or the water bra of the nineties.
There are draw backs though. I have the tiniest ever toes that they really don't have the super miniature ones that go on my ones. I have to cut them. I'm not kidding.And the glue doesn't stay too well on skin. I working out the kinks. And I have plenty of the larger nails left over for anyone with normal sized feet.We can share. If you do not glue them very well you could be at a cook out with one or two missing, but I always carry extras in my purse. Rob keeps finding them all over the house. He made some comment about Hannibal Lector living here. Listen, I actually am not embarrassed of my feet anymore. I wonder if nail salons do acrylic toenails, I am totally in. As of now beauty tip #101....is carrying me for the summer of 2007. No charge for the great advice.

I Miss Baba -Louie

I don't know how it started, but I call Abe Baba-Louie. I would just get up in the mornings and say, Hi Baba-Louie, and he'd laugh. So there you go. Bri and Jake don't call him that...just me.

So I hadn't seen Abe for three weeks. I was freaking out. Will he remember me? Did he think I abandoned him? I mean I spent some time with this boy...and all the sudden, I'm gone.

Well he remembered. I opened the front door and he he was playing in the living room, he actually jumped! And he can't talk yet, but he said, EEEEEEE! And crawled towards me so fast. Then stopped, and went EEEEE! and crawled some more. Then Ozzie got in the picture. Abe climbed up my legs. I loved it. He remembered! My Baba-Louie! Then when I had him in my arms, he just stared at me. He looked my face all over. He touched my face. Isn't that cute? He was making sure who I was. I am grandma Jillsy. You don't know that yet, but I am.

Then I had to sing all my little songs that I used to , three weeks ago. Patty cake, This Little Piggy, and of course, Little Red Riding Hood. You know the song by Sam the Sham and the Pharaohs? The baby would pull my hair....and I would go OWWWWW! Who's that I see walking in those woods? Why it's little Red riding hood. Hey there little red riding hood....you sure are looking good. Yadda yadda yadda. You know how it goes.......And so on. He loves it.

Alright, I know I am pshycho, but I L-O-v_E H-I-M...so whatever it takes. I think the next time I see Baba-Louie he'll be walking. And Bri and Jake will not know what hit them. I can not wait.

A Father's Day Reflection

I just can't let Father's Day go by without thinking about my Dad. In my little girl mind he was a cross between Dick Van Dyke and Fred Astaire. He was a physical comedian like Dick Van Dyke, but had the stature of Fred Astaire. A short little guy, but lean and very agile. He was definitely very handsome and a good athlete. As a daughter , I just adored him. He made all us kids laugh, and more importantly he made my mother laugh. Any time that would happen was holiday for our family. At times he'd be silly and make his face turn into a funny cartoon or tell a story with all his wirey funny mannerisms and we'd all roar with laughter. He never said a mean word about anyone, and go out of his way to avoid any conflict.

Sometimes when I was little, I would pretend that I was sleeping in front of the TV , so he would carry me up the stairs, and tuck me in bed. I loved that. It was difficult sharing him with seven other siblings, but because I was always in and out of the hospital , and not very healthy as a kid, I probably had more one on one with both of my parents.

He was a cheerleader at Notre Dame. My Mom said that was because he was small, and the other guys could throw him around easily.He definitely had gymnastic abilities cause I do remember at family gatherings at Grandma Allen's house with Aunts and Uncles around that they would encourage Dad to do a back hand spring, and he would! Even when he was older....well he only lived till he was 68, so how much older could he have been?

He had the prettiest ice blue eyes. Not one of us kids got them, I still think there is hope for an Allen grandchild somewhere down the line to be blessed with those beautiful eyes. He also had the waviest, thickest hair. I do think my kids got the good hair gene from him.

I really think that his biggest accomplishment in his life was being a Lieutenant in the Air Force during WWII. That must have been quite the experience. He never shared any of those times with us girls, but I think with my brothers , he had some stories. Later in his life he attended reunions of his squadrant, and that made him so happy and proud. He couldn't get over how the Air force officers were actually serving the old pilots food.

The most memorable moment I have of us, was at a cousin's wedding. It was after Rob and I were married, but before we had any kids. Daddy and I were dancing,which is another good memory, my Dad could really dance. He said to me, " you know how the priest said today at the service preached , do not wait to tell the people you love, that you love them?"..... He then said to me , "I love you." At the time, I didn't realize how important that was. You see my husband tells his kids that he loves them, every time he talks to them.

My Dad came from an era that men ....and actually some women, didn't talk about such things. I don't know if they thought it was a weakness, or what. I really didn't know how special that conversation was until years later, when my Dad was very sick. I lived out of town, and didn't get to be with him very much that last year of his life. One of the last times I saw him, I hugged him and told him I loved him. He said , thank you. What went through my mind at the was,You don't say thank you when your kid says that they love you,..... you say I love you too. That is what I say......... That is what I would say.

In retrospect, I think how fortunate I was that he had told me some ten years before, cause I hold onto that, that short little sentence. Now I see and understand how special it was that he DID tell me. I don't even know if he ever told any of my brothers or sisters.

He always called me Jilly. I think I remember telling him to stop cause it made me feel like a baby. Now, if someone calls me Jilly, I think of him, and I like it very much.

My Daddy was a gentleman, a scholar, a great golfer, adored his wife and his family.He worked hard for the church and loved his beer.I miss him very much. I know he is around me, especially when I'm with my brothers and sisters. If you would ask any one of them, they would all agree with my words, and have a few of their own stories, I am sure.